Focus

Focussing on me is hard work. Resting his hard work.  I find it difficult just doing nothing. You're so much that I want to do so much together so much heart to help out. I know that help is needed in my heart wants to do it. But my mind my body or just shutting down. It needs rest. As I go into the fall I feel it is this time for me to focus on myself and get better. That is my job and I know is that I need to follow my doctors rules and  suggestions. It sucks it hurts it's emotionally disastrous but I guess it's something I just got to do. Finding coverage is hard putting everything in my brain into places hard. I just want to make sure that everything I know gets passed on to the new people. What if this happens what if that happens. What happens if they call and I'm not in a cognitive mindset to be able to answer their thoughts.  I know you're not supposed answer it to begin with and they're not supposed to call but I want to be able to help to be there to guide and just to make sure that my family succeed. I just started a new medication and it's really starting to affect me. The serotonin syndrome is real I didn't think it was but it really is. Going off one med and starting another is hard work.i've gone through the withdrawal symptoms and no I'm in the height of it again. To end it's going to be a fight Song Sunday. As the dizziness and nausea SNES go around I feel like the hurricane in southern Florida. I'll just close my eyes and dream of better days listening to classical music that my friend recorded on his piano. That will make the day a lot more doable.